Last night I went with Joelle and Leise to pick up Julia from the airport in Madison, which is where I will be flying out of to go to Ghana. I basically started to cry thinking about leaving all the ones that I love and that love me. I then thought about how fun and exciting it is going to be to see them again after soo long. I know that I will change and that my views on life in general and my life specifically will be changed, but part of me is scared that I will not fit back into my life anymore.
I know that going to Africa is the right move and that if I didn't go I would always live with the what-if's. I am fearful of all the things that can happen here in the states and to my family that will be out of my control. I know I wouldn't be able to stop anything from happening, but what about not being there when something important is going on. I realize that I shouldn't live in fear, in fact God commands us not to. The emotions are just flooding over me. I am so excited and joyous, yet I am so scarred and hesitant.
I am also seeing some friends that I haven't seen in months tomorrow, and I know that as touchy as our relationships have been, will I be able to hold on to our closeness! I also know that this will be the last time I see them before I go to Africa. I wish I could transplant all those who make me laugh during hard times and allow me to cry on their shoulders to Africa with me. Basically what I am trying to say is that I will miss all my friends, blood family and Christian family so deeply while I am away. **I am starting to cry at this point**
It is also my promise to blog at least weekly starting now! I want you all to feel connected to me while I am away and I want to hear all about you guys!!!! One month...ahhh...I can't believe it!
1 comment:
awesome! It is going to be a great experience...I am jealous! I know what you mean though about leaving...because everytime I have been back to visit, I want to move back!
Post a Comment